Bloggy Hell: Discombobulate

Weird Word of the Week: DISCOMBOBULATE
OED definition: "disconcert or confuse"
How to use it:
Try throwing this puppy in at cocktail parties, or when conversing with drunks on the street. For example, a sex-on-the-beach slurping bimbo approaches you, asks for your thoughts on the Iran situation; you could respond with: "I don't know. The world is a discombobulating place. This is a discombobulating party. Your eyes, they discombobulate me." She will, of course, make her excuses and mingle elsewhere. But remember this: you discombobulated that bimbo, and you did it with the weirdness of a word. Be proud. When it comes to chatting with alcoholics on the street, it always helps to speak loudly, with confidence. For example, a fellow approaches you clutching a half empty bottle of Frosty Jack's Extra Strong White Cider. He asks you for some money. What he doesn't know is, you're penniless yourself; you've spent your last £3.50 on half a lager in some West End toss-hole and you're in no mood for doling out charity. Try this: "I'm sorry my good man," and then, with vigour; "DISCOMBOBULATE!" He won't ask you anything ever again. You deflected his advances by the skilful wielding of a weird word. Be proud. But remember: if you do have extra money to dole out to drunks, don't be tight; get them in.

NEXT WEEK (or when I can be bothered): TRANSMOGRIFICATION